Addiction

you're my addiction..
and the thought
that you may need me
even for a second
is more then any drug could ever be
but as with all addictions
there is a downside
and the scary thing is
you are that too.
when you don't need me
my heart is torn out
shredded
stepped on
forever hurt that theres anyone else
jealousy perhaps
that someone else can do what i cannot
even tho i want to
with my whole being
i want to be the one you need
the one you turn to
the one you love.
i live to hear your voice
to see your pain
to be your happiness
to be THERE.
and when you dont want me
i hurt.
when you turn from me
i cry.
when i know that i am the reason you go
i hate.
not you, never you
myself.
for needing you more then you'll ever need me.
for wanting you to be
what you never can be
what you never should be
what i still want.
i dont want to change you
i want to change me
and the pain that makes me reach for you
even when you turn away.
the longing that fills me
when i see you..
the desperate wish to touch..
to have you say just once
"i do need you"
and to know its the truth.
not something said to make me feel better.
i will always be here
forever waiting, always available
however long it takes
to steal just a moment of your time
just a taste of you
just a glimpse
of the you that you could be with me.
until you kill the addiction
and tell me the truth.
that you dont need me
even tho i still need you.

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